Drug Awareness - Make Amends With Those You've Hurt

You’ve completed the list of people whom you have wronged while you were addicted. Maybe you keep looking at the list trying to figure out how exactly you can make amends and heal the relationships. Most likely, you are nervous and anxious about beginning this process. But you are not alone. Many individuals have walked this path before you and you have strength from the higher power of your choosing to help guide you.

You may want to rush through the list of names as quickly as possible, hoping to avoid some of the emotions this step will bring up. This would be a bad idea and would not help you on your road to recovery or those you’ve harmed.

Before you begin, you must divide your list into a few categories:

• ·         Those you should approach as soon as you are confident in your sobriety
• ·         Those you can only make partial amends with since a full disclosure may cause more harm than good.
• ·         Those you shouldn't take action with.
• ·         Those you can't make direct contact with because of the nature of the situation.

It’s important to do this first because you must make amends without causing more harm to the individuals on your list or to yourself. Making amends isn’t about creating more guilt; it’s about forgiveness and healing and letting go.

Timing is another very important aspect of making amends. You should begin as soon as the opportunity arises to contact those on your list and begin to heal the hurt. There will be some people though you won’t be able to make amends to right away because it would only cause further harm. However, don’t let it become an excuse to put off contacting a person on your list.

Make sure you have let go of any resentment you have towards someone before going to make amends. You won’t be able to resolve conflicts if you are still angry and defensive. Think about what you will say and write it down if you need to. This is a chance for you to rebuild bridges that had been previously burnt.

Keep in mind that the person with whom you are making amends is not required to forgive you nor do they need to allow you to speak to them. Some conversations may be very uncomfortable and you may feel vulnerable. All the previous steps you have taken prepared you for this. Be prepared for these feelings and learn from them. Let the experiences and conversations reinforce why you are on this journey to recovery.

For more information on Alcoholics Anonymous, please call 215-923-7900 or visit http://www.aasepia.org/. You can contact the Greater Philadelphia Region of Narcotics Anonymous at 215-629-6757 or visit their website www.naworks.org.

You can also find information in our online Heroin Supplement (www.delcomag.com/Archive/HeroinSupplementAug2016/index.html).

If you need immediate help, please call Community Hospital at 610-497-7200. They are located at 2600 West 9th Street, Chester, PA 19013.